Change is Good. Metamorphosis is Messy.
From where I sit, I can see the 'SOLD' sign on my front lawn. Believe me, I understand and fully embrace the concept that 'change is good', but this feels more like a complete metamorphosis. My heart is deeply rooted in home. Anyone who knows me could suggest that's an understatement. This is huge for me (the messy-good kind of huge).
For fourteen years this home has embraced us. Here we have fought fevers, tended broken bones and broken hearts. Big decisions have been made fireside, with a cup of mint tea or glass of scotch. In this living room we've laughed until we cried, welcomed new puppies and bid tearful farewells. This home has set the stage for outrageous dinner parties, beautiful family gatherings and gloriously-lazy movie nights. It has endured countless storms and one excruciating separation. It was here in this little white house, that my beautiful daughter was conceived and it is here that she now thrives. The pencil marked doorway trim tells the story (my God that one stings). 'Maddie 1 year old', 'Maddie 2 years old.' Actually, I can't bear to leave the trim – it's coming with us. The memories we made here are palpable and my heart aches to the brim with gratitude for every single one of them.
And, then there's my darling little studio. Nestled in the backyard, it is there that I painted my heart out, literally. Simple and tiny in form, its service has been enormous. It's been my therapist, my retreat, my meditation, my journal, my outlet for the highest love and the deepest pain. I will miss it.
But, it's time for change. Time to expand, to trust. Time to love whole-heartedly, to embrace, to leap. Time to EVOLVE.
With an extraordinary man, his beautiful daughter and the support of our loved ones, we are redefining our family. New home. New studio. New life. Things are about to get messy. Stay tuned.
I'm off to purge the tupperware drawer.
"What if I fall? Oh but my darling, what if you fly?” - Erin Hanson